Train.
Yes. One of the most common modes of transport for most Chennaites, which
includes me too, as I’ve been here for around 2 years now. I spend close
to an hour in the train daily and these 60 minutes are interesting since I
encounter many kinds of co-commuters. My observation is closed to the
Ladies compartment only, as this is what I always board.
The walls of the train compartment will
almost always have some info on weird job offers. Like, “Earn Rs. 10001
in a week. Government approved job. Call the following number...”.
The strange thing is these job offers (which are written on bright yellow, or
pink papers) will be pasted next to the railway warning saying “Bill Stickers
Will Be Prosecuted.” It is rightly said “Strange are the ways of the
world!”
Now
coming to the people I’ve met during my time in the compartment. It is
said that women love to talk and express themselves. This according to me
is a good thing about us. But the specific set of lady folk I am referring to
here, seem to have taken this belief way too seriously! They talk about their
life, their neighbour’s life, their maid’s life, and probably their maid’s
neighbour’s life too. Sometimes about the story of the previous episode
of some famous TV serial- why the hero is in ICU, and the villain is
plotting to marry the hero’s girlfriend, how many idlis did the
villain’s mother eat, what is the color of the tail of the dog in the
hero’s house. Why is it less brown today than it was yesterday! Is it
the water? Well, you might think, how is it that I know all this. Well,
anyone traveling is, by default included into the conversation as a listener,
even if she is not aware of it! The best way to save ourselves is to always have some
cotton or ear phones with us.
The next group of people are those for
whom music is life. Yes! They have their ear phones plugged into their
ears and they are constantly swaying to the beats! Even if Shaktimaan waves at
them from outside, they will not notice him, as the only world they are aware
of is that of music. I feel sad for Shaktimaan.
The laptop lovers are another set of
people who can be spotted in the train. They enter the train, find a
seat, and the next thing – their laptops are switched on. There is
nothing more I can say about them. And so, moving on...
The Zombies! Yes, those people who seem
to have watched the movie ‘Go Goa Gone’ and taken it too seriously! They
will stare at you from head to toe with no expression at all. If they are
seated right opposite to you, then mind you! Even if the Samosa-vala offers to
give a free samosa to all the passengers, they wouldn’t know. If he offers
chutney along with the samosa, they still wouldn’t know. (The chutney being talked about here is an imaginary
concept. You will never get chutney with Samosa in trains here.)The train might halt; the train might have reached the
shed. Yet, they will remain zombies and zombies only stare!
Moving on...
How can I miss out the diners? The
people who treat the train as an extended part of their homes – their dining
hall. They will have a dabba, which when opened will contain some snack
along with some smaller dabbas, which would exhibit the yummiest kinds of
chutneys and pickles! The aroma will make you wish you were
their friend/neighbour, so that you would also be offered some. At this moment,
I somehow always remember the Sanjeev Kapoor show, where he tastes the food and
goes “ mmmmm..., this is yummy.” And you somehow always wish you too were
on the show, and had the privilege to taste some of the food and go “mmmmm...I
agree”.
Now, imagine this! There are a whole
bunch of free seats, yet they choose to relax on the floor of the train. Yes.
These are the people who have confused me the most, as I fail to understand them.
The whole train might be free, but these ladies will sit at the entrance of the
train, on the floor. They will sit in groups, talk, sing, look out into
the air, eat. In short the travel is like a holiday for them. A basket, some
bags, water bottles, and other things will be neatly placed near them.
For those of us getting down in the next station, reaching the door could
sometimes seem like a warm up session in the gym. We will have to jump,
and hop and sometimes even wrestle. We also need to pray to all the Gods
in heaven to help us cross these people and reach the door of the train on
time. Chances are, we would be a step away from THE DOOR, and the train
would start moving. This is the exact moment when we wish Spider man came
swinging by into the compartment and took us out of there. Something like
this hasn’t really happened till now, as far as I am aware. Hence, this is one
of those moments which come under Irony
of the highest order.
Another very interesting group are those
who go off to sleep just after getting into the train. Once they are
asleep, we can see their head move from the shoulder of the person at their
left, to the person at the right. At times, the head moves in a circular
direction. It’s like a free demonstration of YOGA FOR THE NECK. It
doesn’t end with Yoga! A little later, the snoring starts, and continues till
the person next to them threatens to complain at the station. The snorers are
thankfully not very common, but if they happen to be around, it could make you
wish you owned a train of your own or had wings and could fly to work.
There are many more kinds of
people. The flower lovers who think the train is a garden. They
will have bags of flowers placed near their seats. The flowers sometimes bring to mind famous movies like DDLJ, where SRK and Kajol run
around in a field of flowers. These ladies will be busy making garlands with
the flowers. They will be so engrossed in what they are doing, that even
if a person asks them for some space to sit, they wouldn’t notice. Flower effect? Perhaps...not sure though!!Then there are the ones who chant and sing hymns, and
are in constant prayer. Another common set of people are the vegetable and
fruit vendors. They come in an army of 3-4 and scatter into various parts
of the compartment. They advertise their sells so loudly that
your hands automatically reach the purse and you contemplate on offering some
crisp notes to them, in return for some healthy stuff. All you wish for
at the moment is that your station is next and you can get off from the train
and find some silence.
And then the rare traveller. Sometimes, guys forget to read the ‘LADIES’
sign outside the compartment, and get into it. This doesn’t normally
happen, but sometimes an unlucky and unsuspecting guy does board the
compartment at his own risk. By the time the guy notices he’s in the
wrong place, the train would have left. There are chances that the guy
then gets some scolding from the women nearby, just like the Saas Bahu serials
on TV. (The sound effects are missing though). By the time the train reaches the next station,
he probably promises to himself that he will be extra careful next
time!
Each day brings a new
story, a new journey, a new discovery. Traveling in suburban trains is an experience.
Even though we don’t intend to, we learn and observe the variety of people
living in this world! This brings to my mind a famous saying, “After all each one of us is unique and
each person has a story to tell.”
